Tell 'em how you feel girls

My apologies for the delay on the blog - I headed home to Georgia to wish my mom a Happy Birthday in person and to see my brother who's home from Tokyo on his winter break. I'm back in New York now, back at work, getting adjusting to the full-time job schedule and writing my book in my spare time.

I've been thinking a lot about women lately - specifically women's bodies. Christina Hendricks (Joan on Mad Men) has been in the news lately after Cathy Horyn from the New York Times called her "not pretty" and a "big girl." Later the Times also admitted to stretching their photo of Hendricks arriving at the Golden Globes. Pretty despicable behavior from a reputable news source. Christina is the cover girl for New York magazine's fashion issue - and in it she says she's tired of all the talk about her weight.

The "infamous" Golden Globes dress
fuck you Cathy Horyn I'd like to see you pull this off

Supermodel Lara Stone (one of my personal favorites) recently told the press "People tell me I'm fat, but when I look in the mirror, that's not what I see." No shit! Lara's maybe one of the most gorgeous women on the planet, a throw-back to Bardot, a size four (!!!!) with one of the tightest, hottest bods and the most beautiful boobs in the fashion industry. But because of the pressure on her to lose weight, she developed an addiction to pills and alcohol. Now, thankfully, she's healthy and sober.

If this is fat, I fucking give up

I, too, have struggled with my weight, just like every woman does. I gained quite a bit in college because I had really unhealthy eating habits (a pint of ice cream practically every night - and I never thought twice about eating fried food and Taco Bell) I never exercised and I was depressed because I was in a toxic relationship. Now, I try to stay away from fast food, I've sworn off soda completely and I avoid fried foods (but I still eat french fries - a girl has to live man). Aside from the obvious goal of just being healthy, I want to feel good in my own body. I want to feel comfortable no matter what I'm wearing. I love clothes and I love fashion and I need for my clothes to fit properly. I try to get to the gym as much as I can, but by no means am I a compulsive exerciser. It's hard to find the time. But I'll be the first to admit living in New York has put much more pressure on me to lose weight and to be thin.

Lady Gaga has a song on her new album called "Dancer in the Dark," about a girl who feels good about herself until her boyfriend tells her she's a "mess"

Some girls won’t dance to the beat of the track
She won’t walk away
But she won’t look back
She looks good
But her boyfriend says
she’s a mess She’s a mess She’s a mess
Now the girl is stressed
She’s a mess . . .

Baby loves to dance in the dark
‘Cuz when he’s lookin’ She falls apart
Baby loves to dance in the dark (Tellem’, girls) . . .

Marilyn
Judy
Sylvia
Tellem’ how you feel girls!

Work your blonde (Jean) Benet Ramsey
We’ll haunt like liberace
Find your freedom in the music
Find your jesus
Find your kubrick
You will never fall apart Diana, you’re still in our hearts
Never let you fall apart
Together we’ll dance in the dark

Now, okay. Just reading these lyrics you may think "huh?" Has Jessica lost her mind? But, seriously. I want to say, thank you, Gaga, for writing an electro dance song that's about body image. I think this is an incredible feat - and on top of it, she's managed to reference (the female icons) and encourage a sense of female community - "together we'll dance in the dark." On top of it all, Dance in the Dark is a genius pop song, appropriate for dancing.

Gaga wants you to love yourself

Gaga knows what's it's like to be insulted for her looks - a google search will turn up "Gaga . . . Butterface . . . Hermaphrodite." Her entire gig is about individuality and wearing / doing whatever makes you happy - not to attract a man, but rather to push the envelope of what's considered sexual - isn't confidence and happiness the most attractive thing after all?

Christina Hendricks isn't the first gorgeous woman with big, beautiful breasts and hips. Not only that, Hendricks has the most beautiful complexion I've ever seen - and green eyes and red hair to top it all off. Sure, she's a different shape than the female starts we're used to seeing - and I think that's great. People come in all different sizes. Some are healthy, some aren't. The emphasis on weight, the pressure that women undergo every day to be thin whether they're in the spotlight or not, continues to be a lethal issue. It is literally a battle of life and death. So I'd like to encourage everyone, especially women, to stand behind each other, to defend each other, love your bodies and take good care of them. They belong to you. The minute you let someone else tell you what to do with your body, you're in the danger zone.